Slacking

Sorry to those that read this as I have been slacking for a little while as far as entries go. Honestly the movies that have been coming out as of late have pretty well looked like they sucked. The next movies I plan on reviewing are Sherlock Holmes and Avatar. Once I have a new review up Ill let everyone know.

Paranormal Activity

Paranormal Activity; a low budget no name film that was made in 2006, but is now one of the biggest movies of the fall. It seems like this movie came out of nowhere but thats not quite the case. I looked into the background of this movie and found out that is was made for virtually no money, but a very interesting fact came up in that this film was originally shown to Steven Spielberg. Mr Spielberg had the film for one night and promptly returned it to the movie studio saying that it was haunted and scarred the hell out of him.

So what is Paranormal Activity? The story follows a couple who is dealing with some ghostly presence in their house. As the story goes along we find out the the girl in the movie has been dealing with these strange experiences since she was 8 years old. The story picks up a few weeks after the activity has started again and the boyfriend has decided that he is going to use his newly purchased video camera to do his best to record these on goings in a attempt to figure out what the hell is going on. The girlfriend thinks this is a bad idea and initially wants nothing to do with it. Throughout the movie the camera is used for all of the scenes, as the camera is carried around by the main characters or sitting on its tripod filming them throughout the night.

The couple starts to experience more and more of this activity and the girl decides to try to get some help from a psychic. That is about as far as I will go into the details of the movie because to say more would start to ruin the movie for some. As you watch the film, especially the scenes shot while they are sleeping, pay close attention to the minor details such as the shadows on the door and the powder in particular.

In trying to keep this review short to not give away the details I am left thinking that if there is one scary movie to go see this is it. I have seen many "horror" and "creepy" films but this one by far takes the cake. The thing that really gets to you is the sense of vulnerability that you feel for the people as the activity takes place when they sleep. This is easily my new favorite creepy movie I have seen, as by the end I genuinely had a sense of unnerving going through my body.

Zombieland

I know that I have been lacking on the posts as of late but there has been two good reasons. For one is that there were not really any good movies coming out as of late, and for two I have had someone to hangout with that has been occupying my time in a good way. Regardless the time has come to review a movie I have been looking foward to since I first saw the previews; ZOMBIELAND!!!!

If you have yet to see the previews for Zombieland it is a movie about people who are trying to survive in a America that has been over run with zombies. The story follows the four main characters who all join the story at different times. The key thing to this movie is to follow the rules (once you see the movie you'll understand what Im talking about).

Lets start with the beginning with the the character called Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg); as the story goes on you learn that they have actual names but they use the name of the town they are from since friendships dont last to long in Z-Land. Columbus is a college kid who is trying to get back to his home town to see if his parents are still alive after the zombie plague spread across the country. Along the way he explains the way he survives in the post apocalyptic wasteland that America has become, all the while reminding us of his rules. As he travles along he meets Tallahassee (played by Woody Harrelson). Tallahassee can best be described as the one guy that you would want around in case of a zombie apocalypse, yet would hate to be friends with normally. The comedic genius between Tallahassee and Columbus is just unbelievable. The play off of each other so well with Harrelson being the loud mouth no rules type of guy and and Eisenberg being the over cautious rule following nerd that never left his house if it wasn't necessary. A little ways in they meet up with Wichita and Little Rock (Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin), a set of sisters that even before the zombie takeover were a couple of con artists that would take advantage of anyone to make a quick buck. The two play there parts very well and add a lot to the story, if fact without them the story wouldn't really be anything but Columbus running around (rule 1: Cardio) and Tallahassee finding new and inovative ways to kill zombies.

The movie does have it share of gore and gratuitous violence but honestly thats part of what makes this movie so much fun. Watching the different ways they kill off the zombies is just amusing and had me cracking up most of the movie. For example how often would you see a zombie get beaten down by a banjo?

This movie could be called our country's answer to Shaun of the Dead, but with a way better ending. Within the first few minutes of this movie you will be laughing you're ass off and having a good time. One thing that real got me going was the appearance of a certain celebrity that I was completely shocked to see would do a film like this, but damn I'm glad he did since he was extremely funny. This is by far my new favorite zombie comedy and I would love to go watch it again. One last thing before I sign off until the next film is this: Always follow the rules and make sure that when the zombie plague hits make sure you have Twinkies handy since you never know who might want one.

Pandorum

Anyone that knows me knows that I like horror movies. Whether they are good or bad I like see what twisted stuff comes out of the minds of writers. Well this week Pandorum came out and watching the previews for it it seemed like the type of movie that was right up my alley. Well I was partially right on that anyways.

Pandorum follows a spaceship traveling through space to colonize a new planet for humanity. It seems we have finally got to the point where we have destroyed the earth and we need a new planet to live on. So they cram 60,000 people into a craft called a "sleeper ship". The whole idea behind this ship is that people are put into a type of deep sleep/freezing that causes them to age extremely slowly and helps store them for the type to this new planet. The trip is supposed to take 123 years and when the crew gets there they are to start colonizing and get everything ready for the rest of mankind.

The movie start up with the craft already in route to its destination and well on its way there. Two of the crew members wake up from the deep sleep to discover no one is around. The side effect of this deep sleep is that you have temporary amnesia. If everything is going right then there are people manning these pods so that when a person wakes up they can take them through the process to regain their memory. Once the two crew members are out of their pods they realize that they have no clue what is going on or where they are. Once they escape the pod room they begin to locate other crew members that are being attacked by strange creatures throughout the ship. As they fight these creatures off they start to understand the predicament that everyone is in. The creatures themselves are rather interesting as they are all different from one another. Luckily the origin of these creatures is explained as the film progresses (and no they are not aliens).

Once the film really gets going we are shown a message the crew received shortly after they left earth informing them that earth was destroyed and they are all that is left of humanity. This is shown in a flashback that reveals what is actually going on in the craft and what the truth is about everything. I wont ruin they twists in this story but they are somewhat easy to see coming if you are paying attention.

By the end of the movie I was impressed with the overall story and concept, but confused to no end about the time-line of what takes place. While the story does not jump around in time at all the sheer number of years that the crew have been living on the ship is a little confusing. While this wasn't the best horror/sci-fi movie I have seen it wasn't really all that bad.

Just a heads up I can already tell you that the next movie review will be Zombieland. Personally I think this looks like the American version of Shaun of the Dead and I am a little geeked to see it.

Inglorouis Basterds

A friend of mine sent me a message asking me to review this movie. Im not sure why I didnt do it in the original postings since I had seen it in that same time frame as the other few that first posted. I am glad he asked me to pst this review though since this is a great follow up to the end of my last post where I talked about original ideas since this is one.

This movie is exactly what this blog is all about. It is a movie made for guys that does not hold anything back. From the scalping of Nazi soldiers to the gunning down of hundreds of people this is a great guy flick that is right in the top ten of my favorite movies around.

The first thing you have to know about this movie is that it is not all about the squad known as the Inglorious Basterds (the misspelling is intentional due to Tarantino's notorious ability to constantly misspell words). The movie also follows the story of a young Jewish girl who runs a theater in France, in fact the story starts with her family hiding from the Nazi hunters in the French country side at a farm. The film as delves into a short side story about a French soldier given a special task by a French government officer (played by someone you would never see coming). By the end of the movie all 3 of the story lines come together into a amazing finish that is beyond words.

The second thing that you need to know about this film is it is done straight up "Kill Bill" style with chapters. In the first few seconds of the film you see Chapter 1 on screen and it cuts to the french country side with a man chopping wood. It almost makes you believe you are seeing part of the wrong movie. Hell you don't see Brad Pitt's team show up until about 30-45 minutes into the movie, but when they do they do with a bang. As the chapters progress you and you get closer to the final scene you begin to see how the 3 stories intertwine.

The real payoff of this movie comes from Brad Pitt's team "The Basterds" as they are called by the Germans. The team is comprised of various Jewish man looking to get revenge on the Nazi's from the acts they have committed. Of all the team members I have to say my favorite, and the favorite of most people I have talked to, was the "Bear Jew" played by Eli Roth. For people who don't know who Eli Roth is he is the director of some of the most fucked up horror movies around, such as Hostel and Hostel 2. This guy is seriously twisted in the head so for him to show up in this movie and put out a great performance makes me think he should consider a career switch. The "Bear Jew" is the one person on the team that most of the Nazi soldiers fear as he doesn't shoot people very often, instead he beats them to death with a baseball bat.

The end of the movie continues Tarantino's love of graphic violence. While I wont say anything about how the film actually ends I will say this I actually clapped at the end of this movie it was that good. Any guy out there who denies himself the chance to see this masterpiece is a nut-less coward who is afraid of truly seeing the horrors of war. On a quick final note at times the movie is actually pretty funny at times, especially the beginning of the final scene in the theater where Brad and 2 of his men decide to act as Italians even though they don't speak Italian.

9

Im sure anyone who actually takes to time to read this blog has seen the previews for this movie (which Im pretty sure is only 2 or 3 people in the whole world). And of those people who do read this and actually know me in real life know that I have a little thing for animated movies. Well when I saw the trailer for this movie I was instantly intrigued by the premise and the style.

Lets jump right into this and explain the plot of this movie. See the movie is all about the downfall of humanity due to the invention of the worlds most advanced machines. There is a scientist who creates and machine that is basically a self automated A.I. based on the professors intelligence. The machine turns skynet on humanity and starts creating machines that are designed to eliminate all life on earth. The machines succeed in doing this but now before the original scientist that created the A.I. goes on to create the dolls that you see in the previews and that the film revolves around.

In total there are 9 dolls that are shown in the movie, each with a number in thier back shown the order in which they are created. Each of the dolls has its own personality that comes through as the movie progresses. The movie starts with the creation of 9 and just takes off from there. Within the first few minutes of the film you meet you of the films protaganist "The Beast". The Beast is a cat like mechanical creature that has a cats skull for a face. In the beginning you have no idea why the creature is hunting the dolls, although it is explained later. As the film progresses you learn more about what happened to life on earth and what the role of the dolls in the in the fight against the machines.

By the end of the film you feel for the dolls and their plight against the constant attacks from the machines. I have to admit this is one of the more original movies I have seen and recommend it to anyone and everyone as all ages can enjoy it. I can only hope that we see more films like this and "District 9" coming out of Hollywood in the coming years instead of these high budget, big name director pieces of garbage they have been pumping out.

Whiteout, should have been a Blackout

This weekend was a double feature of movies that I wanted to see so I decided since I have nothing better to do I would go watch both. Wow what a waste of time with the first movie. See I went to the theater to watch "9" but it wasnt playing again for around 3 hours, so I started trying to figure out how to waste some time before I could go see it. I had seen the previews for "Whiteout" and figured I would go see it, especially since Kate Beckinsale is hot.

I wander into the theater a few minutes before the movie started and should have known right then that the film was going to suck. The film wrapped while running through the trailers and stopped for about 5 minutes. I should have looked at this as a sign to leave, but saw it as a opportunity to get a few movie pass for "9". Once the movie started back up and we got to the feature thats when the crap started.

From the previews you see for this movie it appears to be a thriller/sci-fi movie that takes place in Antarctica. There is hints at a big twist or some unknown type of thing that is killing people off. Well niether of these is the case. The killer turns out to be someone that you realize is the bad guy within 10 minutes of the film starting. The whole time I was thinking "OK we are just being baited into thinking he is the killer and some huge twist will come along and prove us wrong"...NOPE. In the end I was sitting there thinking that this was a massive waste of time and annoyed that I had sat there for that long.

Lets talk about the special effects. The gory factor of the movie is ok with some decent cosmetic effects. The title of the movie is Whiteout so you expect some huge snow storm that adds to the story. Well there is a snow storm, the problem with it is that it doesn't add to the film it detracts from it heavily. The snow storm takes place during a big action sequence in the movie and due to the whiteout you cant see a damn thing that is going on.

My opinion is to stay away from this movie in any way that you can. Don't go see it or rent it. Hell even the "shower" scene with Kate Beckinsale in this movie was a huge disappointment. What a waste of my time, almost didn't write a review of it I was that annoyed with it.